| CHAPTER ONE |
[Jan. 13th, 2007|08:10 pm] |
There is something very comforting about silence. Its one of those luxuries that are slowly disappearing from our noise polluted world.
I sat in the silence of my 6th floor apartment, waiting for my toes to dry. I had a date that night that I insisted would go well. Painting my toenails gave me that extra bit of confidence that I needed. One last blow to my pink feet and I was ready to go. I surveyed myself in the mirror. Upon further inspection, I pulled my long brown hair up into a messy bun and put on a denim jacket. I tied up my strappy sandals and ran out the door to the subway station.
New York City is more than just a city; it's a state of mind. I had lived there for seventeen years; since I was four years old. My father was an investment banker who wanted to take his turn on Wall Street, my mother, an entertainment lawyer. I grew up in a house full of nannies and housekeepers trying to keep me from touching anything out of the confines of my own room. I had learned to survive the city on my own at a young age, and by the time I was fifteen, I was spending most of my evenings with friends at local concerts and clubs.
Snapping back to the present, I dropped my token in the slot and went to stand on the subway platform. Something about the subway is ridiculously romantic. You're never quite sure who you're going to see.
A train blew past and I stepped through the silver doors and sat on a cold seat. I surveyed my surroundings. A mother and son, coming back from a day of summer shopping, a young couple holding hands and laughing, a strikingly handsome blonde haired man reading a newspaper. I wanted to know all of their stories, but I assured myself that they wouldn't be nearly as interesting as I figured they would be.
My stop came quickly. I could have walked, but I wanted to spare my feet the agony. Plus my shoes were too nice to be bloodstained on their first night out. I stood up and held onto the pole to steady myself. I scanned the train one last time. Mother and son: still there. Loving couple: still loving each other. Blond haired man: folding up his newspaper and standing up. The doors flew open and I stepped onto the platform. Up the stairs and one block south, there was a gorgeous man waiting for me, my boyfriend, Jeremy. Jeremy and I had been together for two years, and things were going so well. I knew that sooner, rather than later, our relationship would be taking a step in a more serious direction. I walked up to the front door of our favourite Italian restaurant, Il Trattoria. Jeremy was sitting in a booth waiting for me. He waved me over.
"Clare" He said. "Nice to see you. I ordered for both of us."
"Thanks babe"
Our meals were set down in front of us. Two plates of Veal Scallopini. We sat in silence for a few seconds while we took the first bites of our meals. This was a side of Jeremy I'd never seen before. Usually he'd be talking my ear off, telling me about his day, or his job. He had a publicity and public relations job at MTV that had brought him to New York, and into my life.
"Clare, we need to talk"
I dropped my fork. It made such a noise when it hit my plate that I immediately regretted it. Nothing good ever comes after "We need to talk" I kept my cool.
"About what, Jeremy?"
"About where we're going"
My shoulders relaxed. OK. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all. Could we possibly be talking about marriage? I delicately put a piece of veal into my mouth.
"Continue" I said, as I ate my dinner as gracefully as I could.
"Its just that, lately I've been doing a lot of thinking about the future and who I'd be spending the rest of my life with, and I've really had a great time with you but I just don't think we're fit to be spending as much time together anymore. Its not fair for either one of us."
I instantly felt sick to my stomach. Was he breaking up with me?
"Are you breaking up with me?"
"Its not that I never want to see you again, its just that I don't think its right for us to be so serious if there's no future."
I ran over his meticulously rehearsed speech in my head. No future? Just earlier tonight I thought I was going to marry him, and he just told me we have no future. My dinner no longer looked as good to me. I was fundamentally un-marriable. I had lost my appetite.
"Well, I respect your opinion" I said through the lump in my throat. "I guess I'd better be going now."
"Clare, please stay. Finish your dinner?"
"No thank you, Jeremy. I've lost my appetite"
I placed my napkin on my plate and stood up. I was fighting back tears as I walked out the front door. I was not the type to cry over a man, but I couldn't stop it. I loved Jeremy. I thought we were going to be together.
I was surprised to find that it had gotten considerable colder outside when I left the restaurant. I shivered as I walked towards the subway station. I checked my watch. 9:30. I stopped.
No.
I was not going to let this guy get me down so far that I was calling it quits at 9:30. I wiped the tears from my face and I looked around. Across the street there was a bar. It was a bit of a dive, but it looked good for what I needed at that moment: A Stiff Drink. I ran across the street and opened the door. The bar was empty. I was glad that no one would be able to watch me drink away my pain. I sat at the bar and ordered my drink.
"Gin and Seven, and make it a double, please."
The bartender smiled at me.
"Rough day?" He asked.
"I guess you could say that"
He placed my drink on a napkin in front of me. I immediately took a sip. It was strong. Almost too strong but I could feel my pain start to dissipate. I was onto my second drink before I heard the door open again.
"I'll have a gin and seven, double please"
I laughed and spoke, not even looking at the man I was speaking to.
"So I guess you had a bad day also?"
"You can say that again"
He sat down next to me. I turned to him and raised my drink. I almost had to do a double take when I saw him. It was the blonde haired man from the subway. He was even more gorgeous now that the gin was taking its desired effect. I tuned back in when he started to speak again.
"So, do you come here often?"
I laughed into my drink.
"Nice line"
"Thank you." He said. "It works for me every time."
I turned in my seat and focused on my drink. It was a while before the gorgeous blonde spoke again.
"I have an idea." He said.
"Just as long as I can keep my clothes on"
He laughed "For now. Anyways, here's what we're going to do. We'll ask each other questions about our lives, whoever's answer is better has to buy a shot for the loser...so are you game?"
I thought about it.
"I’m not so sure"
"Oh come on…it could end up good for you with a lot of free drinks."
That was the clincher for me. I couldn't say no to a free drink.
"Ok, kind sir. You're on. You're up first."
He sat and thought.
"Ok, what brought you here tonight?"
"My long-term boyfriend broke up with me. I thought he was going to propose. You?"
"I got stood up on a blind date. I think you win."
"I think so too."
He placed the shot down in front of me. I drank it without hesitating.
"Look at you!" He said. "You’re a champ! OK…your turn"
"Hmm…where did you grow up?"
"All over the place, but my home town is Tulsa, Oklahoma. What about you?"
"I've lived in New York since I was four."
I ordered another shot from the bartender.
"Hey! Tulsa wasn’t that bad."
"Its not New York though."
He thought about it. "Yeah, fair enough. OK, final question. What do you do for a living?"
"I'm a teacher."
"Aren't you a little young for that?"
"Well, I graduated early, so I lucked out that way…what do you do?"
"I’m in a band."
"Hmm…tough call. Are you in a good band?"
"Ever heard of Hanson?"
"Ha! No WAY! You get two shots for that one."
I ordered two more shots from the bartender.
"Ouch. I guess I shouldn't bother asking if you're a fan."
"Yeah. I'd say some things are better left unsaid. So which one are you, anyways?"
"I'm Taylor"
I stared at him blankly.
"...the piano player" He said
"Ah yes, the cute one."
"Well. I don't know if I'd say that."
I definitely would. His light blonde hair hit just below his chin, and he was pretty. Male model pretty. He had piercing blue eyes, and he filled out his designer jeans like a champ.
Man was I ever drunk. I couldn’t risk staying there and doing something stupid…like sleeping with the girl from Hanson.
"Well, Taylor, it was very nice meeting you, but I'm afraid I have to be going now."
I stood up and immediately felt all the alcohol I had consumed that night go straight to my head. I lost my balance and stumbled back onto the barstool. Taylor steadied me by the shoulders.
"Slow down there. Exactly how do you think you're getting home tonight?"
"Subway." I slurred.
"And do you really think that's a good idea?"
I looked him right in the eye for a few seconds. I couldn't gather enough lucidity to give him an answer.
He smiled. "I didn't think so. Come on."
He helped me up and I balanced myself on his shoulder. He was very tall.
"Where are you taking me?"
"I’m going to get you home"
He walked me out to the sidewalk and hailed a cab.
"What's your name?"
"Clare Dawson"
"And your address?"
"7434 West 83rd"
I sat in the backseat and listened to him talking to the cabbie
"Can you get my friend Clare home?"
I rolled down the window
"Thank you for doing this"
"I wouldn't let anyone wander the streets in this condition"
I laughed
"Goodbye"
"Goodnight, Clare"
He knocked twice on the roof of the cab, and I watched out the window as we drove away, and he got smaller and smaller. |
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